Let’s start with the truth:
That feeling you get—that gut twinge when you sense someone is watching, tracking, or maybe even trailing you? It’s there for a reason. It’s called intuition. And it exists to protect you.
As a forensic specialist and crime writer, I’ve studied many real-world cases where people ignored that early warning… and paid the price. I’ve also studied the survivors—people who listened to their instincts and took action.
This isn’t about fear-mongering. It’s about equipping you with real, actionable tools to respond if you ever suspect someone’s following you.
So, what should you do?
Step 1: Trust Your Gut—But Stay Calm
That gut check? It’s your nervous system trying to keep you safe. Don’t dismiss it. But also—don’t panic. Fear clouds judgment, and your #1 goal in this moment is to stay calm and think clearly.
Ask yourself:
▪️ Have I noticed this person or car before?
▪️ Are they matching my pace or route?
▪️ Are they mimicking my behavior (stopping when I stop, turning when I turn)?
Pro Tip: Try taking three consecutive right turns. If they follow all three, you’re looping a block—and you’re probably being followed.
🚨 Still unsure? Step into a public place like a café, hotel lobby, or well-lit store. Use reflective surfaces—mirrors, windows, phone screens—to monitor them without being obvious. Observation gives you power. Control the moment by slowing things down and staying alert.
Step 2: Slow Down—Literally
Whether you’re walking or driving, don’t speed up. That’s a natural impulse—but it feeds the panic and you’ll lose your calm. Slow down. Observe. Get the upper hand on the situation.
Do this:
▪️ Walk slower. Stop. Tie your shoe. Look in a store window. See if they linger.
▪️ Drive under the speed limit. Pull into a gas station or well-lit parking lot. Wait. Watch.
You’re not just trying to evade; you’re confirming. You’re collecting data.
What you’re doing is buying time. And time = options.
Slowing down also gives you a chance to assess your surroundings. Where are you? Be able to state to yourself the location you are at. Street names. Stores. Landmarks. Also, are there people nearby? Is there a safe place to duck into? Observation leads to opportunity—and potentially, your escape route.
Most of all, breathe! Deep breaths! This calms your central nervous system and feeds oxygen into your brain so you can think and react sharply.
Step 3: Call Someone—Even If It’s Not A 911 Situation (Yet)
If you’re feeling watched or followed, you don’t have to be alone in that moment.
Call a trusted friend or 911 and stay on the line.
▪️ Say where you are, where you’re going, and what’s happening.
▪️ Give details: street names, car makes, clothing, license plates, physical descriptions.
Just saying things aloud can help you stay grounded. And if you do end up needing help, someone already knows where you are. Ask your contact to stay with you on speakerphone and keep track of your movements in real time. This creates both emotional support and a digital trail.
When should you call 911?
▪️ If the person/follower tries to approach or engage you
▪️ If you’ve confirmed they’re following through multiple turns
▪️ If you feel unsafe getting out of your car or entering your home
You don’t have to wait for “proof.” Your job isn’t to build a legal case. Your job is to stay safe.
Step 4: Never Go Home
This is critical. If you feel you’re being followed, don’t lead a follower to your house. Or your workplace. Or your kids’ school. That’s not just about protecting yourself—it’s about protecting everyone connected to you.
Instead:
▪️ Head to a public place—well-lit, populated, with cameras.
▪️ Police stations, fire stations, libraries, and major stores like Target or Starbucks are good options.
▪️ Drive-throughs also work. You’re safe in your locked car, but surrounded by people and cameras.
▪️ Parking near entrances, walking under security cameras, or approaching staff members gives you visibility and immediate support.
If you’re on foot and need help fast, walk into any business and ask for assistance. Say clearly:
“I think I’m being followed. Can someone stay with me while I call the police?”
People want to help—and businesses often have safety protocols for these situations.
You’re not being paranoid. You’re being prepared. And you’re giving yourself the best chance to end the situation safely.
Step 5: Observe Without Engaging
Your job is to notice, not confront.
Focus on details:
- Your physical location.
- Car make, model, color
- License plate
- What the person looks like—height, build, hair color, clothes, distinguishing features, ethnicity
- Behavior of follower (Are they on the phone? Pretending to shop? Always 20 feet behind you? Unique movement patterns or gait)
- Audible or Verbal cues if you overhear speech. Even the sound of a ringtone or music can be useful.
If you do call police, this info can help them respond faster—and better.
But don’t stop to take notes. Your safety > your memory. Do what you can. Move to safety.
Safety Extras: What to Carry
Want to level up your safety while traveling or commuting? Here’s a checklist of lightweight safety items that can help:
- 🔊 Personal safety alarm (clips on your bag)
- 🧨 Pepper spray or gel (check local laws)
- 🔦 Tactical flashlight (can disorient and illuminate)
- 🔋 Portable phone charger
- 📱 Emergency contact info set in your phone
- 👟 Comfortable shoes (in case you need to run)
Real-World Story
In Last One Alive, Emily Hartford faces an unexpected danger in the parking lot of her office building. In one chapter, she’s followed by someone she assumes is a bystander… until the stalker makes a move. What saves her? Her instincts, her awareness—and the fact that she knew exactly what to do. She didn’t wait for confirmation or attack. She didn’t hope she was wrong. She acted. And it turned out okay for her. The stalker turns out to be the catalyst for the investigation of a cold case.
Real-life stories are no different. According to the National Crime Victimization Survey, only 13% of stalking victims report being followed or watched—a figure experts believe is underreported due to fear, shame, or uncertainty.
Knowing how to spot the signs—and how to respond—can be the difference between a close call and a tragic outcome. It’s not about living in fear. It’s about living informed. Whether you’re walking to your car at night or traveling solo, don’t dismiss that uneasy feeling. Trust your gut. Know your options. And above all, remember: awareness is your first line of defense.
You’re Not Overreacting
If something feels off—it probably is.
Trust yourself.
Take steps.
Make noise.
Ask for help.
It’s not “paranoid” to protect yourself. It’s not dramatic. It’s not overreacting.
It’s smart. It’s proactive. It’s survival.
And if I’ve learned anything from decades around forensic professionals and real-world cases, it’s this:
The people who survive aren’t always the strongest or fastest.
They’re the ones who listen to that whisper of instinct and act on it.
The ones who don’t wait for proof.
The ones who take their safety seriously.
So if your gut says something’s wrong?
Believe it.
Because your life is worth protecting.
🔍 Sources & Citations
- National Crime Victimization Survey (NCVS) – U.S. Bureau of Justice Statistics
Stalking Victimization in the United States
Link: https://bjs.ojp.gov/content/pub/pdf/svus.pdf - RAINN – Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network
Personal Safety Planning & Awareness Tips
Link: https://www.rainn.org/articles/personal-safety - National Institute of Justice – Stalking Prevention & Resource Center (SPARC)
Safety Planning Guidelines for Stalking Victims
Link: https://www.stalkingawareness.org - U.S. Department of Justice Office for Victims of Crime (OVC)
Victim Response & Safety Recommendations
Link: https://ovc.ojp.gov - Recommends victims never go home if they suspect they’re being followed, and emphasizes documenting behavior when safe.
- Gavin de Becker – The Gift of Fear
A widely respected resource on personal safety and intuition, de Becker emphasizes trusting instinct and outlines common behavioral patterns in stalking and assault cases.
ISBN: 978-0440508830 - National Sexual Violence Resource Center (NSVRC)
Bystander Intervention & Safety Awareness
Link: https://www.nsvrc.org CDC – Personal Safety & Emergency PreparednessLink: https://www.cdc.gov/features/emergency-kit/index.html
